Tuesday, February 14, 2012



Valentine's Day: That one day of the year that you either get to gush about how fabulous your love life is or tell everyone you know how you think it's an overly commercialized, "created by Hallmark holiday" just so lazy people can ignore their "Honey Bunches of fucking Oats" the other 364 days of the year. 365 days of the year. (Thanks for the added day of misery, Leap Year!)

For me, this year, I wasn't sure which group I would fall into. It's the first Valentine's Day that I've been single in well over 15 fucking  years. I wanted to think that I'd embrace my inner bitch and celebrate "Single Appreciation Day", but I wasn't really sure how I'd react when the actual day got here.

The Ex and I always celebrated. Not in your normal, "buy random shit with no special meaning" kind of way. We went all artsy-fartsy creative, or we did random and crazy, goofball type of stuff. So, I wasn't sure if I'd feel depressed and lonely, drowning my sorrows in a bottle of wine, or partying my ass off, running around the streets naked, celebrating the fact that I didn't need to do a damn thing this year. Yes, I realize that both extremes involve excessive amounts of alcohol. It is still a holiday, and the best part of any holiday is that it makes excessive alcohol consumption socially acceptable. But I digress.

I woke up confused. I didn't really feel like I fell into either stereotype. (Except for knowing that, either way, I'd be visiting the liquor store. Like I said. Holidays make it mandatory.)   I got stuff for the kiddos, went to work, and went on about my fucking day as if this "holiday" didn't exist. Hell, denial has always worked for me in the past, so I'll take the odds that it will work today!

That's when it hit me. Just what DO single people do on V Day when they aren't whining about how much they hate it?!?! So, I decided to embrace all of the good things I can enjoy about being single on Valentine's Day.

For the first time in 15 years,Valentine's Day didn't make me:

1. Shave my legs. I live in a drafty as fuck house, and shaving in the middle of winter just causes razor burn!

2. Worry about bribing the kids to actually sleep in their own beds. (That one always winded up biting me in the ass...and not in a good way...at about 3AM, anyway)

3. Avoid my "comfy clothes" for more than10 minutes after walking in the door.

4. Stand at the liquor store, worrying about what kind of alcohol we'd both like I like but could pretend that I didn't know he hated.

5. Clean the fucking house. I'm sorry, preach all you want about "I'll do it anywhere and everywhere", but NOTHING kills the mood better than being thrown down, ready to do the deed, only to find a Lego stuck up your ass!

That's my take on this holiday. I hope you have all had a wonderful VDay, whether or not you are celebrating or running through town naked. If you're running around naked....pics or it never happened!

How did your VD (heheheee) turn out?

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